Tuning into Love instead of fear and shame

In the several quotes on this page I have referred to tuning into, or plugging into, energy internally. As I stated in the quote from my Trilogy above, 'Every human being is equipped with the "proper receiver" to tune into the Transcendent vibrational frequencies.'

"Each and every one of us has an inner channel. . . .

But our inner channel is blocked and cluttered with repressed emotional energy and dysfunctional attitudes. The more we clear our inner channel through aligning with Truth attitudinally, and releasing the repressed emotional energy through the grief process, the clearer we can tune into the music of Love and Joy, Light and Truth."

Quote from Codependence: The Dance of Wounded Souls

Aligning with Truth attitudinally - aligning with the metaphysical Law of Attraction - is vital to our healing and Spiritual awakening. Releasing the repressed emotional energy is also - which is the point I am trying to make in this article.

One way of looking at this experience of being human that I have found very helpful - that helped me to change my perspective of, and therefore my relationship with life - is to look at this human experience as having the horizontal and vertical components / planes.

"Codependency and recovery are both multi-leveled, multi-dimensional phenomena. What we are trying to achieve is integration and balance on, and between, different levels. One of the ways it is helpful to me to think of this is in terms of the horizontal and vertical. The horizontal is about being human and relating to other humans and our environment. The vertical is Spiritual, about our relationship to a Higher Power, to the Universal Source.

In this context, what we are trying to achieve in recovery is to integrate the Truth of a Loving God-Force / Goddess Energy / Great Spirit into our relationship with the horizontal. That is what helps us to achieve some balance in our emotional, physical, and mental relationship with being human and in how we relate to other humans and our environment. . . . .

. . . . . Looking at the horizontal and vertical dimensions of life helped me to start being and to start doing in a more balanced way. It helped me to stop being a human doing - thinking that what I accomplished, or how I looked, on the outside is what gives me worth.

I talked in last months column about the transcendent emotions of Joy and Love and how we can access these emotions by being in the moment when relating to nature for instance. I am going to close out this months column with a quote from one of my Update Newsletters where I talk about transcendent vertical emotions and horizontal human emotions.

"I capitalize words such as Truth, Joy, and Love in my writing because that capitalization indicates that I am referring to the Transcendent vibrational energy that flows through the Illusion on the vertical plane. When I do not capitalize joy and love, I am referring to emotions of the horizontal plane. . . . .

. . . . . Happiness is a term I use in relationship to external circumstances. It (happiness) comes from doing, experiencing, interacting, etc. Joy - with the capital J - is about being, not doing."" - Balance on the horizontal, Integration of the vertical

Here is a quote from my Trilogy in which I discuss what the horizontal and vertical mean in my understanding.

"The higher vibrational emotional frequency of Love, Light, Joy and Truth is not only a higher frequency but also has a different rate of wobble - which makes it possible for this energy to be flowing throughout the Illusion on all levels. This is the anomaly that was mentioned in the discussion of emotional energy in History V - and the reason that the joy that is a horizontal emotion is different from the Joy that is a Transcendent vertical emotion. Here is that discussion to refresh your memory.
There are many aspects of the human emotional process that have been, and will be, discussed throughout these books but it is necessary at this point to mention the difference between vertical emotions and horizontal emotions. The emotional energy vibrational frequency range that is Love, Light, Beauty, Joy, and Truth, is a vertical Transcendent emotion - that is, it exists through all levels within the Illusion, from the Spiritual Plane downward vibrationally to the physical plane. It is the highest vibration naturally occurring within the Temporal Plane, and exists as an anomaly - that is an exception to the structure of the lower vibrational frequencies - because it is not a lower vibrational frequency. It is available to all humans in the moment when they are willing and able to be present and to feel their feelings (stop and smell the roses) - and is available an ever increasing percentage of the time to individuals who are awakening Spiritually as they clear their inner channel and tune in to the Truth within them.

Horizontal emotions exist within the Temporal Plane. These emotions - which include anger, fear, joy, happiness, sadness, etc. - have a vertical component, (that is, higher and lower vibrational frequencies within an emotional range and between different emotions) but are not the lower frequencies of the Love, Light, and Truth frequency range. They are a completely different but, of course related, type of emotion.

The transcendent, vertical, emotions of Love, Joy, etc., exist within and are accessed by tuning into the God place within us. The horizontal emotions are generated by attitudes and experiences of the physical plane, and can be felt in the absence of, or in conjunction with, the transcendent emotional energy.
The horizontal emotion of joy can feel very much the same as Joy - and can in fact help us to access the Transcendent emotional energy of Joy. But the horizontal emotion that is joy is a relative reaction to external stimuli. That is, joy is felt because of some outside or external condition that raises our vibrational frequency within the vertical component of the horizontal emotional spectrum. This can be: an accomplishment such as achieving a goal or winning a contest; the feeling we get from experiencing the Love of another being - or an animal; a sensual experience such as the taste of food, or the feel of silk, or the touch of another being; or any of a number of other types of stimuli that are dependent upon outside circumstances or agencies. There is nothing wrong with feeling joy in reaction to these outer or external stimuli - what is dysfunctional is believing that they are the only source of joy. When we buy into the belief that the only joy or happiness we can experience is dependent upon external circumstances or outside agencies then we are giving power over our relationship with self to the illusions - we are worshiping false gods.

The Transcendent emotional energy of Joy on the other hand has nothing to do with winning or accomplishing - it is about being. About tuning into the Joy that is the Truth of who we really are - Spiritual beings who are part of the Holy Mother Source Energy. It is about the Love that is our True essence. Outside influences can help to remind us of this connection - a sunset, a baby, the Love we see reflected in another's eyes - but the connection is made in the quality of our interaction with that outside influence. It is in being in the moment that we can tune into the Love, Light, and Joy of our connection with everyone and everything.

The quality of our interactions is dependent upon the intellectual paradigm - the attitudes, beliefs, and definitions - that we are empowering to determine our perspective and expectations. Those perspectives and expectations are what dictate the quality of our relationship with life. As we align our intellectual paradigm with the Truth of Unconditional Love, Joy, and Abundance, we change the quality of our relationship with our self and with life.

We can tune into the Transcendent vibrational frequency of Joy even when conditions on the outside appear to be tragic. The more we awaken Spiritually, and enlarge the intellectual paradigm that is dictating our relationship with life, the more freedom we have to feel Joy in any moment of our lives - because that Joy, that Love, is the Real Truth of who we are. The more we let go of taking the illusion personally and seriously, the more we can have the capacity to be happy, Joyous, and free in the moment.

There is nothing wrong with feeling joy at doing, or receiving, or experiencing, on the human level - but the more that we are aligned with Truth, the more we can magnify those moments of joy to include the Joy of being Unconditionally Loved and Lovable. This also helps us stop giving power to the illusion by believing that something or someone outside of us is the source of Joy - the Source is within." - The Dance of the Wounded Souls Trilogy Book 1 History of the Universe Part VI "Notes to Earthlings"

The difference between the horizontal and the vertical emotions is what I was referring to in the Law of Attraction article when I wrote: '. . . a statement from Marianne Williamson that "What is not love is fear." That is not only black and white but simplistic and linear as if Love and fear were the same type of emotional energy.' As I have said, the goal is to align attitudinally with Love as the Truth - but that doesn't mean we are not going to feel fear at times in our human adventure.

Marianne Williamson is obviously a powerful teacher of Truth, a mystical messenger carrying the message of Love - but she could use some codependency recovery to help her stop making black and white statements that are shaming and give people the impression they are doing something wrong if they feel fear.

All of us who are drawn to this healing, who have a soul compulsion to follow a spiritual path, who are in recovery seeking answers beyond what is available in most 12 step meetings, are old souls who are present in body in this lifetime to heal these wounds and settle Karma. Marianne Williamson is obviously an old soul who has done much work clearing her inner channel to Truth and Love and Light, but I do wish she would recognize the importance of clearing our inner channels of the repressed grief energy.

"The planetary conditions that blocked humans from accessing Christ Consciousness - the vibrational Knowing of the Truth of ONENESS - were in place for tens of thousands of years. Conditions have now changed! We have entered a new time, an Age of Healing & Joy has dawned in Human Consciousness on the planet. All of the "old-souls" involved in healing in this time have the capacity to access the Truth of ONENESS and Love through their inner channel.

(The term "old-soul" refers to the stage of consciousness evolution an individual has attained by this lifetime - it does not mean better than, or farther along than, those who do not have to do the healing. There is no hierarchy in the Truth of a Loving Great Spirit - those who appear to have low, or no, consciousness in this lifetime are simply doing their healing in another space-time illusion parallel to this one. All old-souls are born at a heart-chakra level of consciousness and therefore have more sensitivity, and less capacity for denial, than other people. In other words, the gift of having access to Truth and Love carries with it the price of greatly increased emotional sensitivity.)

Due to the planetary conditions, the human ego developed a belief in separation - which is what made violence possible and caused the human condition as we inherited it. The reflection of that human condition on the individual level is the disease of Codependence. Codependence is caused by the ego being traumatized and programed in early childhood so that our relationship with ourselves and the God-Force is dysfunctional - that is, it does not work to help us access the Truth of ONENESS and Love. It is through healing our relationship with ourselves that we open our inner channel and start tuning into the Truth." - Jesus & Christ Consciousness

It is important to own our horizontal human emotions at the same time we are aligning with Higher Truth attitudinally. Developing a boundary between emotional and mental - relating to our thoughts and emotions as two different kinds / levels of energy, because they are - is the key to integrating Spiritual Truth into our emotional relationship with life. We need to clear our intellectual programming (including subconscious) of false beliefs and dysfunctional definitions and attitudes, at the same time we are learning to be Loving, nurturing and compassionate in relating to our own emotional wounds to take power away from the repressed emotional energy from our past. We need to set boundaries with both the critical parent voice and with the emotional wounds / inner children so that we can stop letting the past have so much power in how we are living today.

"One of most important steps to empowerment is integrating Spiritual Truth into our experience of the process. In order to do that it is necessary to practice discernment in our relationship with the emotional and mental components of our being.

We learned to relate to our inner process from a reversed perspective. We were trained to be emotionally dishonest (that is, to not feel the feelings or to go to the other extreme by allowing the feelings to totally run our lives) and to give power to, to buy into, the reversed attitudes (it is shameful to be human, it is bad to make mistakes, God is punishing and judgmental etc.) To find balance within we have to change our relationship with our inner process.

Feeling and releasing the emotional energy without giving power to the false beliefs is a vital component of achieving balance between the emotional and the mental. The more we align ourselves attitudinally, and clear out our inner channel, the easier it is for us to pick out the Truth from amid the dysfunctional attitudes - so that we can set an internal boundary between the emotional and mental.

Feelings are real but they are not necessarily fact or Truth.

We can feel like a victim and still know that the fact is we set ourselves up. We can feel like we made a mistake and still know that every mistake is an opportunity for growth, a perfect part of the learning process. We can feel betrayed or abandoned or shamed, and still know that we have just been given an opportunity to become aware of an area that needs some light shined on it, an issue that needs some healing.

We can have moments where we feel like God/life is punishing us and still know that "This, too, shall pass" and "More will be revealed," - that later on, down the path a ways, we will be able to look back and see that what we perceived in the moment to be tragedy and injustice is really just another opportunity for growth, another gift of fertilizer to help us grow.

I needed to learn how to set boundaries within, both emotionally and mentally by integrating Spiritual Truth into my process. Because "I feel feel like a failure" does not mean that is the Truth. The Spiritual Truth is that "failure" is an opportunity for growth. I can set a boundary with my emotions by not buying into the illusion that what I am feeling is who I am. I can set a boundary intellectually by telling that part of my mind that is judging and shaming me to shut up, because that is my disease lying to me. I can feel and release the emotional pain energy at the same time I am telling myself the Truth by not buying into the shame and judgment.

If I am feeling like a "failure" and giving power to the "critical parent" voice within that is telling me that I am a failure - then I can get stuck in a very painful place where I am shaming myself for being me. In this dynamic I am being the victim of myself and also being my own perpetrator - and the next step is to rescue myself by using one of the old tools to go unconscious (food, alcohol, sex, etc.) Thus the disease has me running around in a squirrel cage of suffering and shame, a dance of pain, blame, and self-abuse.

By learning to set a boundary with and between our emotional truth, what we feel, and our mental perspective, what we believe - in alignment with the Spiritual Truth we have integrated into the process - we can honor and release the feelings without buying into the false beliefs.

The more we can learn intellectual discernment within, so that we are not giving power to false beliefs, the clearer we can become in seeing and accepting our own personal path. The more honest and balanced we become in our emotional process, the clearer we can become in following our own personal Truth."

Quote from Codependence: The Dance of Wounded Souls


This next excerpt is from an article in which I stress the importance of recognizing that healing and recovery are a process. Life is not about reaching destinations - it is a journey. The goal is to learn to relax and enjoy the journey while we are healing. When we are living life in reaction to old tapes and old wounds, we do not have the capacity to relax and enjoy the journey.

Etheric X-ray

"I learned in my own grieving process - and later applied in my work with clients - to pay attention to where the energy was manifesting in the body. The grief associated with my emotional incest issues was being carried in my lower back on the right side. As I mentioned above, this grief was near the second chakra because it was associated with my relationship with my own body and sexuality. It was in my back because that is where I carry issues I don't want to see. It was on my right side - which is the masculine side - because it was blocking me in my relationship with my own gender, which was greatly affecting my relationship with women.

It would seem that the process of healing would be easier if we could go into a healers office and get an etheric x-ray taken of our emotional, mental, spiritual bodies as well as of our physical bodies. The diagnosis might come out sounding something like this:
Well, we have, what looks like a good 3 pounds of grief energy here in your back near the second chakra - that indicates some grief related to sexual issues that you don't want to look at, probably some sexual abuse, or at the least some wounds in relationship to sexuality and gender.

And a good 5 pounds of grief around your heart chakra. Those indicate multiple traumas to the heart - a strong pattern of looking for Love in all the wrong places, trying to fill your heart with love from external sources.

There is also some severe congestion in your throat area. Your throat chakra is completely closed - which indicates an inability to own your voice and speak your Truth. It also includes internal communication problems, that is blockage in your ability to trust your own intuition. Which is related to the dark mass here in your forehead. That is your third eye - or Spiritual vision - chakra, and shows that the intellectual programming in your mind is too limited and blocks your ability to see your self or life from an expanded Spiritual perspective. etc., etc.
But the reality of how the healing process works is that we need to peel away the layers of our codependent defense system gradually. There are healers who can tell us that we have these grief issues - as I stated in the quote from my True Nature of Love series that I used in the article on grieving that was part of the last chapter.
"It is possible to get intellectually aware of some of them through such tools as hypnosis, or having a therapist or psychic or energy healer tell us they are there - but we cannot really understand how much power they carry without feeling the emotional context - and cannot change them without reducing the emotional charge / releasing the emotional energy tied to them. Knowing they are there will not make them go away." - Grieving - examples of how the process works
In the same case study that I quote there, I mention how I said to the man the very first session that there were childhood issues that were keeping him from being able to let go. I could have quizzed him more completely about his history and most likely have pinpointed that the time of his parents divorce was the crucial period in relationship to what he was going through when he came to me. But that would not have helped him to get in touch with those issues in an emotional context. He needed to go through the process of pealing layers of his defenses to gradually get to those specific emotional wounds.

There was a quote in a meditation book that I read a year before I went into treatment. This was before I had surrendered to doing the emotional healing. It was a message from the Universe that was part of my path of being lead to do the emotional work. It really made me angry when I first read it. A year later when I was in treatment, someone in my primary therapy group - which I attended at least once every weekday - would be asked to read the days meditation. There were 5 or 6 daily meditation books lying around in that therapy room. Whoever was asked to read the days meditation would pick one of those books and open it up - either randomly or specifically to the meditation for that day. During my 30 days in treatment, I only was asked to read the meditation once. I reached down on the floor and grabbed the nearest meditation book and opened it up. I opened it up to the same quote I had read a year earlier. It still made me angry. It said something to this affect:
A knowledge of the path does not replace putting one foot in front of the other.
We are here to go through the process - to experience the journey. The human part of me wants to jump to the end and get to happily ever after. I needed to learn to accept that the process unfolded gradually, that there were always more layers of the onion to be peeled - and some tears to be cried with each level.

It is through experiencing the journey in the moment one day at a time, that we heal our wounds and settle the Karma we are here to settle.

The reality is that our emotional pain is so great that if all of our defenses and denial were stripped away at once, it would kill us. So, getting such an etheric x-ray would only point us in the direction we need to travel - it wouldn't help us skip any part of the process. We get the guidance we need to know the direction to travel, by following the carrots - the messages from the Universe. We don't get to know what the future holds. We do get everything we need for our journey one day at a time - even when it doesn't feel like it.

"There is no quick fix! Understanding the process does not replace going through it! There is no magic pill, there is no magic book, there is no guru or channeled entity that can make it possible to avoid the journey within, the journey through the feelings." - Attack on America - Chapter 9 Vomiting out grief energy

This last excerpt is important because it does emphasize that we need to go through the process - that life and recovery are a journey. As the quote from my book that ended that excerpt states: Understanding the process does not replace going through it! It doesn't matter how much knowledge one has of the metaphysics, we still need to feel and release the emotions in order to clear our inner channel to Truth and Love.

"Each and every one of us has an inner channel. We now have the capability to atone - which means tune into - to atone, to tune into the Higher Consciousness. To tune into the Higher vibrational emotional energies that are Joy, Light, Truth, Beauty, and Love.

We can tune into the Truth of "at ONE ness." Atone = at ONE. Atonement = at ONE ment, in a condition of ONENESS.

We now have access to the highest vibrational frequencies - we can tune into the Truth of ONENESS. By aligning with Truth we are tuning into the higher energy vibrations that reconnect us with the Truth of ONENESS.

This is the age of atonement, but it does not have anything to do with judgment and punishment. It has to do with tuning our inner channel into the right frequencies.

But our inner channel is blocked and cluttered with repressed emotional energy and dysfunctional attitudes. The more we clear our inner channel through aligning with Truth attitudinally, and releasing the repressed emotional energy through the grief process, the clearer we can tune into the music of Love and Joy, Light and Truth.

It is not easy because we have been taught to look at being human backwards. We were forced to accept a reversed perspective. We were emotionally and subconsciously programmed to react to life dysfunctionally based on reversed belief systems.

We are Spiritual Beings having a human experience.

NOT human creatures who have to earn Spiritual existence. We are not flawed, shameful humans who have to do human perfectly, who have to do the "right" things in order to transcend."

Quote from Codependence: The Dance of Wounded Souls

A quote I use later on this page I state: 'We are the music of The Great Spirit - we've just been way out of tune.' Chapter 13 in my online book is focused on the same theme.

"When I was working on these two chapters focused on codependency and the New Age Movement, I got an e-mail from someone who had recently ordered my book that said the following:
"Dance, Dance, wherever you may be. That's what the Lord of the Dance said He. Dance, Dance, wherever you may be and I'll be with you in the Dance said He."

The trick is to change the music! I got it! The trick is to get free, so you can dance to a different music. The freer you get the more you hear, or should I say feel or see the music. You did a great job - Thanks

"The dance of life for humans has been grounded in shame and fear, empowered by belief in separation, lack, and scarcity. These are lower vibrational emotions and beliefs based on the three dimensional illusion that humans experience as reality. As long as the dance of humans harmonizes to music - vibrational emanations - that are rooted in shame, fear, and separation the only way to do the dance is destructively."

"It is on the Spiritual Plane that the highest vibrational frequency range naturally available to human experience is generated (by the Souls). This frequency range is the transcendent Emotional energy of Love. This Love frequency range also contains frequencies which are experienced as Truth, Joy, Beauty, and Light as well as sometimes being called; the God within, the Goddess within, the Christ within, The Holy Spirit, etc."
The later two quotes are from my page: The True Nature of Love - part 3, Love as a Vibrational Frequency. The second one in a different color because it is a quote from my Trilogy that I used on that page. I believe that the first part of the person's e-mail - up to "I'll be with you in the Dance said He." - is from a song called Lord of the Dance.

What is important about this e-mail I received is that the person did "get it." We need to change the music we are dancing to - and in order to do that we need to change the subconscious intellectual paradigm that is dictating our emotional reactions. And we cannot do that without doing the deep emotional healing. . . . .
. . . . . Our emotions are what drive us, what propel us, through life. Our emotions tell us who we are. If our relationship with our own emotions is messed up, we cannot see reality clearly.

If life is a dance, then our emotions provide the music. Dancing in the dark according to rules that are dysfunctional is not much fun. Dancing through life believing that we have responsibility for the feelings and behaviors of others, doesn't allow us to relax and enjoy life very much. Believing that we have to earn love by doing the dance "right,' by being perfect, in order to reach the destination where we will get to live happily-ever-after - sets us up to be unhappy and blame ourselves for being unworthy and unlovable." - Emotional Honesty and Emotional Responsibility Part 2 - codependence recovery
It is through doing our deep emotional healing and changing the subconscious intellectual paradigm - changing the music that we are dancing to - that we can start having discernment internally that allows us to more clearly hear / feel the messages of our intuition. There is a huge difference between our emotional truth - the feelings that are triggered by our emotional wounds and/or created by the perspective we are viewing life from - and intuitive Truth that is coming from our Soul. As long as our emotional truth - what we feel - is being dictated by childhood emotional wounds and the perspectives of self and life learned in childhood, then our relationship to this human dance will be dictated by music provided by our damaged ego self rather than the intuitive Truth that is coming from our Spiritual Self. . . .

. . . . We have been dancing through life in disharmony and imbalance - in dis-ease. It is by clearing up our relationship with our own internal process - so that we can change our core relationship with self and life - that we can start to dance with some balance and harmony to the music of the ultimate Truth of Love and Joy." - Codependency Recovery: Wounded Souls Dancing in the Light Book 2: A Dysfunctional Relationship with Life Chapter 13: Changing the Music: Love instead of fear and shame